2007-05-31

teacher bangs a boyoboyoboy man!


if i had to pinpoint a beginning, i'd say it probably started during those tender, bittersweet middle school years. no scratch that. it did start during those tender, bittersweet middle school years. with Ms. Kramer. holy shit mang! fucking bomb diggity! like 5'1", blonde, hardbody ya know? 7th grade spanish was always a treat. she would bend over at least four times a class, like she knew that's what we wanted to see.

i remember during track practice, she used to do the watermelon stretch (think "ass out, legs up, show me that you wanna fuck!"), in those bright red univ. of indiana short shorts. yeah. what's worse is that she was really into black guys. ahhhhh! haha. fuckemos! she ended up marrying a prominent black baltimore politician. naw fuck that son! what's he got that i didn't have at 12 years old?!

comin up in the game, i always wanted to fuck a teacher. Ms. Kramer kinda got the ball rolling when she wore this really slutty micro mini for halloween. still not sure what her costume was meant to be exactly. streetwalker? poss not def.

sure. it's normal for hormone-addled youngbloods to be into the notion of poking on a prof. if the piece, ahem, the instructor is fly enough, any adolescent's gonna ponder the possibility. but i kinda feel my urge was stratospheric. abnormal. admittedly, balling at the collegiate level has thoroughly diminished the appeal. the disparity in student/teacher sensibilities just isn't there, and plus i'm meeting birds at the boozer who are my age who are teachers. where the fuck's the fun in that?

but back in the "day?" oh snap son! it was on like megatron out that bitch!

even today, when i hear stories of punkass 14 year olds smashing gorgeous, stripper-hot 30-something teachers
(Debbie Lefave anyone?), i get more than a little bitter. in fact, i can honestly say that i hate on the kid who fucked Debbie Lefave (repeatedly) more than i hate on say, Justin Timberlake for banging out Britney/Diaz/Scarlett/Beal/etc. for reals. scout's fucken honor.

but looking back, the environment just wasn't right. honestly. north baltimore, hyperconservative, pro-norm private school. not that big on taboos. for some insight, peep the webpage HERE.

but wait. further examination reveals a double standard looming large within those brick walls, creeping about those labyrinthine halls. because you see, at this straight-laced, high-brow, all-boys institution, while young boys weren't succumbing to the seductive throes of buxom cougars, there was certainly a whole lotta shakin goin' on on the other end of things. get me? in four years of high school (and one of middle school), my class saw five different deans of students. a big fucking deal in this realm. change is bad they'll say.

most notable among the changes were the expulsions of Mssrs. Stewart and Hincker. while Hincker left under murky circumstances (he may or may not have fucked a female student while abroad; she was 19 and a complete slut, so whatev), stewart def breached the realm of "murky." his shit was straight up felonious kid!

basically, this asshole began frequenting teen chat rooms online, growing friendly with a 14 year old we'll call Jenny. friendly enough in fact that he sent Jenny a naked picture of himself, with the head cropped off. when Jenny asked why she couldn't see his face, Stewart replied, "a teacher has to be careful."

careful indeed. but of course, this being the tragicomedy that it is, things go awry. well awry.

Jenny is really a fucking fed decoy. so when, after months of lewd convos and shady picture exchanges, an eager "Jenny" suggests that they meet at the local MegaMall, Stewart bites on the playaction fake. like a late-round draft pick rookie linebacker.

gotcha bitch!

when he gets there to meet the underaged object of his online affection, he finds not a nubile young twink but a cavalcade of barrel-chested federal agents in cute little matching black jackets ready to fuck his world up.

two years in prison. good show jeffrey.

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