Interstella 5555: Part Two.

Part Two. Those helmets Daft Punk rock are fucking dope sick! but one has to wonder just how comfy they are. hmmmm... i bet they're super duper comfy. like a motorcycle helmet lined with clouds and babies' dreams. i mean how else could you explain them never really removing them? it must be like sex for your face. i kinda feel like they even wear them when they're banging out their wives/groupies/girlfriends. maybe they get off on "technologic" sex? who knows?

as i don't have the luxury of wearing a full face helmet everywhere i go (especially not during sex; could you imagine the explanation?), i think i'm gonna strike out on my own headgear crusade. what piece of equipment would be worthy of a brave young soul who once went out on the town in a Onesie? you know, the fleece pajamas with the footies that you used to wear back when you couldn't do math problems or even count without using your fingers. god we were fucking dumb back then.

but yeah, being the onesie wearing cavalier, i've decided that it would be right and proper to bring back ski goggles as the facial accessory of choice. and i don't mean in some hipster-chic bullshit scenester way. no. i mean like fucking robbing the corner store style, eating now-or-laters by the case, bringin chaos to blocks like the riots in Watts. Think less Lower East Side, more Wu-Tang "Forever."

Interstella 5555: Part One

if you needed any further evidence of the beauty of youtube, this is it: interstella 5555, in its entirety, albeit divided into parts. but hey, thieves can't be choosers right?

released at the end of '03, this dvd was an animated complement to Daft Punk's astronomical Discovery album (for the dilettantes, it's the one with one more time on it). with pictures by Leiji Matsumoto and sounds by Mssrs. Bangalter and de Homen-Christo, it was nothing short of a masterpiece, detailing the abduction and rescue of an interstellar pop band. it was nothing short of cross-media marketing genius as well, with the DVD/Discovery combo being parlayed into a lucrative vinyl figure racket.

if i were those green cats in the video, i mean if i were abducted (a euphemism of course for getting your ass snatched), i would def develop stockholm syndrome. i mean how could you not? what would bring a human being to the point where he or she dubiously procures another human being the way i dubiously procure a cheap bottle of vodka while the bartender's not looking? they're just so pitiful and helpless, those kidnappers. i thinks they be needin a hug, right quick.

and as for the video, i know what you're thinking. fuck you kasai, i can just go on youtube and watch the entire thing on my own.

but the loose nail gets the hammer my little mogwai, so stay close to me now, lest you be picked off by the laser-eyed werewookies that shoot killer bees from their gnarled fingertips. i'll keep you safe. plus you watch the parts here, and you get to bear witness to my brilliance. oh it just shines ever so brightly now!

i mean have you read fucken youtube comments lately? rubbish! you're better off crashing at my place. why are you looking at me like that? c'mon. c'mon! don't worry, i'm not a creep or anything like that baby. i'm not some creep predator ok?!

or am i? i don't remember things so well since the electro-shock therapy started ramping up.

fuck warp records!

This is the 1stAveMachine-produced video for Warp Records artist Clark's single, TED, from the album, Body Riddle.

Little Skittle with a pony in the middle. eats ice cream off its belly in the hot noon sun. i like ice cream. i eat it in the bathtub sometimes, though i'm not s'posed to. might get electrocuted. i make my own ice cream. i don't trust ben and jerry after what they did to my animals. especially my munky. he is sooooo not chunky!

as a child, or rather, earlier in life, (as i still am a child in many ways; a lot of us are, despite appearances), i used to be really into insects. i had a veritable library of books on them, as well as numerous apparati for the collection of said insects.

we had an enormous dead tree behind the house and i would forage through the soft, bristling deadwood in the brutal summer heat, collecting various beetles (i almost forgot how to spell beetles; thanks john, paul, george, and ringo), flying things, "true bugs," salamanders, and the occasional mantis.

the city sent a crew to clear out that portion of those woods one year, and i became more interested in sports and twat than antennae and abdomens. so insects and i have a strained relationship these days. to say the least.

but i guess i should patch things up.

there's a billion of THEM for every one of US, and they've been here for 400 million years. probably be HERE for that long once WE are gone. if there's a HERE left that is.

big ups to 1stAveMachine for restoring my love affair with the insect.