That Pandemic! That Plymouth Rock! TM

I remember when "they" started making ("urban") public school kids wear clear backpacks so that security and law enforcement stooges could see what the kind of heat/drugs/stabbing weapons the little nappy-headed tikes were packing. Even more hilarious is that it was just then that the Columbine jump-off, well, jumped off and school shootings at "suburban" places of learning became en vogue. Natch.

The Jake Gyllenhaal film Bubble Boy reminded me of all this madness, because you see, once he's broken out of his medical-grade-plastic tomb and strikes out in his personal isolation sphere to track down the woman that he loves, he has this thing called the decontamination chamber on the side of his bubble that is, in actuality, one of the clear backpacks I was on about sentences before.

Synchronicity. Pachinko Tiffany.

As I sit, broken stem in hand, about to tumble headlong off the precipice of that Plymouth Rock, I'm reminded of a hate crime recorded in the exurban neo-yuppie fuckpit that is Howard County, Maryland:

"Jews Rule"
"Go Jews"
"Swastikas with Xs through them"

Not sure of the exact details, but who gives a fuck.

A bit of pro-Semitism for a change. And from the looks of him, the victim's Jewish. How can I tell? Let's just say I have some experience in the field. Wink-Tink.

Man I wanna fucking join a cult. Like yesterday. Get some of that brainwashed trim before it drops dead in a bright blue Nike jumpsuit.

No comments: