I Can't Feel My Face!

You'd think that by now motherfuckers would get the picture.

You go to a Lil Wayne/Juelz show (especially one in a second-tier city like Baltimore), and you gotta expect the unexpected.

Intrusive searches.
Traffic stops.
Overlong opening acts.
Poor acoustics.
A fashion show.
A severely abbreviated set from the headliners.

For a show that was barely advertised (many found out the day of the show), Clarence 'Du' Burns arena was packed with hip-hop heads bursting at the seams in anticipation of a barnburner of a show... Weezy and Santana, furthering the campaign launched by their mixtape 'Blow: I Can't Feel My Face.'

Much to the chagrin of the Baltimore Sun (and others), all fans were patted down upon entry, like common criminals. Shouldn't be a surprise at a show like this. Like Weezy said so many years ago: "The Block Is Hot!" And Streets Is Watchin'!

And when the opening acts literally get five times the stage time of the headliners, remember kids, this is a rap show. In the way of an excuse for their chronic lateness (which led to their protacted set), the opening act claimed they were unlawfully searched on the way to the venue and were held up by the Baltimore Police Dept.

Yeah.

Then came the main event. Weezy strutting onstage, plaided out, with Juelz soon to follow, both shouting their lyrics, trying in vain to compensate for the miserable sound dynamics of the indoor soccer arena.

Then, silence.

Sent home like teenagers at a busted kegger.

The promoters claim that they cut the show short because, with all the histrionics of the openers, Juelz + Tha Carter's 25 minute set ran up against the 2 a.m. curfew blanketing the city.

Add all this to the fact that the last time Lil Wayne came to town (@ Morgan State University's typically raucous homecoming), three chicks were hospitalized following a stampede after a hype-man threw fistfuls of cash into the crowd.

Yeah.

So it goes, so it goes. Quid Pro Quo and all that. Maybe next time Baltimore. If there is a next time.